RAK ON: The Secret to Breaking Free from Perfectionism
Dr. Rak ("rock" here).
This week, I’m reflecting on perfectionism and the journey to overcoming it. Many of us grapple with this, a topic I discussed in depth with my most recent podcast guest, Jordana Confino.
In our conversation, Jordana shared her story of being a high-achieving lawyer who, despite her outward success, felt a profound sense of dissatisfaction and burnout. She pursued law for all the wrong reasons—prestige, external validation, and societal expectations. It wasn’t until she reached a breaking point, both mentally and physically, that she started to question her path. Through therapy and discovering positive psychology, she realized the deep-seated perfectionism driving her. Jordana learned to embrace self-compassion, realign with her values, and ultimately find a more fulfilling path in her career.
For a deeper dive into Jordana’s journey from burnout as an attorney to coaching other professionals on avoiding it, along with practical tips on harnessing self-compassion, check out the latest episode of The Health Feast podcast. Listen on Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Substack | YouTube
Listening to Jordana’s story, I couldn’t help but reflect on my own experiences with perfectionism. In my medical career, I often felt immense pressure to excel, driven by a fear of not being good enough.
After finishing residency training, I felt compelled to specialize in something because, as Jordana put it, not doing so didn’t feel shiny enough for me. I convinced myself that I wanted to be a kidney specialist. However, a few months into my fellowship, I realized how unhappy I was. The academic research career path didn’t resonate with me. What I truly wanted was to take care of patients as a general internist.
This realization was pivotal. Leaving my fellowship after the first year of training was a brave decision. It forced me to confront my perfectionist tendencies and reassess what truly mattered in my life. Like Jordana, I found that embracing imperfection and focusing on my core values led to greater fulfillment and peace.
As Jordana shares, perfectionism can be a double-edged sword. While it might drive us to achieve, it can also lead to burnout and a loss of true self. By practicing self-compassion and realigning with our values, we can break free from the chains of perfectionism and discover a path that truly resonates with who we are.
So, this week, let's RAK Our Week by taking a moment to reflect on our relationship with perfectionism and consciously embracing our imperfections with self-compassion. Together, let's cultivate a mindset that values growth and authenticity, leading us toward a more balanced and fulfilling life.
Roots Reflection 🌳:
What is one area of your life where perfectionism holds you back, and how would embracing imperfection and self-compassion transform your experience?
Awareness Action 🧘🏾:
This week, pay attention to your self-talk. Notice when you are being overly critical of yourself. For example, if you catch yourself thinking, “I screwed up” or “I’m not good enough,” reframe it to, “Everyone makes mistakes. I’m learning and getting better.” Practice this regularly to cultivate a more positive and supportive inner dialogue.
Kindness Opportunity 💖:
Extend the self-compassion you've been practicing to someone else. If you notice a friend, family member, or colleague being hard on themselves, offer them a kind word of encouragement. Remind them that everyone makes mistakes and that learning is a part of the journey. Your kindness can help them embrace their own imperfections with more compassion.
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Last week, Dr. Rak shared insights on willpower and how to strategically use it to achieve your health goals. Learn why willpower often fails us and discover practical tips to make healthy habits enjoyable, control your environment, and become disenchanted with unhealthy behaviors.
The Health Feast Corner 🎧
If you’ve been enjoying The Health Feast, please do us a favor by subscribing to the podcast on your favorite platform (Apple Podcasts, Spotify) and leaving a review. Your support is much appreciated!
NEW EPISODE! Episode 30: The High Achiever's Guide to Self-Compassion with Jordana Confino, Professional Coach. In this episode of The Health Feast podcast, Dr. Rak welcomes Jordana Confino, a Yale Law School graduate, certified professional coach, and expert in positive psychology and well-being. Jordana shares her compelling journey from experiencing severe burnout in her legal career to transforming her life through self-compassion and positive psychology. The conversation delves into the impact of perfectionism on mental and physical health, and Jordana offers practical strategies for overcoming it. She emphasizes the importance of aligning personal values with daily actions and how small, actionable steps can lead to significant changes in overall well-being. Additionally, Jordana discusses the link between perfectionism and chronic pain, offering insights into mind-body medicine and how positive psychology principles can be applied to address physical health issues. Learn how self-compassion can lead to lasting success and well-being and discover transformative insights to help you thrive. Listen on Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Substack | YouTube
Episode 29: Redefining Health and Wellness with Jason Gootman. In this enlightening episode, Dr. Rak sits down with Jason Gootman, a health and wellness coach, certified nutritionist, and certified exercise physiologist known for his candid and transformative insights into health and self-improvement. Jason discusses his journey from battling weight issues and identity to championing lifestyle medicine and wellness coaching. He delves into salutogenesis—a focus on wellness creation rather than disease treatment. The conversation emphasizes simple, evidence-based lifestyle changes and the need to demystify complex health issues into actionable steps. Jason shares his personal story of adopting a sustainable health approach, highlighting the critical role of addressing our basic needs and fostering a harmonious relationship with ourselves. The two invite listeners to reflect on their health journeys and underscore the importance of moving towards a healthier, more conscious society. Listen on Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Substack | YouTube
Support Dr. Rak's Spartan team RUCK CANCER. Proceeds go to Bay Area Cancer Connections, an incredible non-profit that helps women with breast and ovarian cancer. A HUGE THANK YOU to all who have donated! As of this writing, we have raised over $5000 to support women navigating this challenging moment in their lives. Learn more and help us reach our fundraising goal here:
Thanks for walking this path with me. I always look forward to hearing your stories and insights, so feel free to hit reply or join the RAK ON chat and share a bit of your world. Or pass this message along to someone who could use a boost of Reflection, Awareness, and Kindness in their life.
Live Well and RAK ON,
Dr. Rak 👊🏽
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